WE ALREADY LOVE Taken 2 — not just because we can’t wait to see Liam Neeson kicking a serious amount of ass, and not just because the sequel will almost certainly feature some variation on the legendary “I don’t know who you are…” phone call, but because it’s forcing Neeson to do some weird, weird promotional work (like getting naked for $20,000 on the Ellen de Generes show).
After putting his clothes back on, Neeson called in to do a slot to ESPN Sportscenter last night. If you want to watch it in full the video is here, but if you can’t be bothered, here are the highlights:
On the New York Jets’ 34-0 defeat at home to the 49ers…
“Ok, we better start again. Can we? Are we live? Oh, shit.”
“Ok, I’ll be very honest with you Mike. It’s only the second football game I’ve ever been at in my life. I still don’t understand the rules but on Sunday, yes, I know the Jets got trounced”
Translation: Liam Neeson doesn’t care for your silly little rules about swearing on TV. And even a guy who admittedly knows nothing about American football knows that the Jets suck.
On coach Rex Ryan’s decision to bring in Tim Tebow…
“See you’re speaking ancient Arabic to me buddy, I swear to ya. I just don’t understand the game yet.”
Translation: Tim who? Dude, I just told you I know nothing about football.
On boxing’s heavyweight division…
“I’ve kinda given up on the heavyweights. They’re not up to speed really.”
Translation: Watching David Haye run his mouth while the Klitschkos knock out a bunch of bums is no fun for anyone.
On a possible Floyd Mayweather v Manny Pacquiao superfight…
“I personally don’t think it’s going to happen. I think Floyd is scared of him, of Pacquiao. I think he thinks Pacquiao will beat him.
“It would be one of the fights of the century I think if they could get it together, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.”
Translation: Man up, Floyd. The world wants to see you get spanked.
On the world’s best soccer player — Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo…
“Messi. Quicker, faster, better thinker. Can pull it out when he has to.”
Translation: The soccer journos were right. Trolling Ronaldo is fun.
On Rory McIlroy v Tiger Woods…
“McIlroy of course.
“He’s 22, 23 years of age and he has the potential to be a great player. He’s already a very, very good player but he has the potential to be great.”
Translation: I’m from Northern Ireland; he’s from Northern Ireland. What do you expect me to say?
On the New York Knicks or the New York New Jersey Brooklyn Nets…